My family really is rad as shit. My dad stepped in to be the short people's father after my
*Even if she did drag my sorry self out of bed this morning to take a Barre3 class. . .at 6:00 am. My perky ass thanks you, Holly, but my screaming hamstrings kind of hate your face right now.
But while my family is the center of my universe, today I find myself thinking of my other family. . .my chosen family. My friends. So, at the risk of going all Leo Buscaglia and running around hugging and crying and shit, I did want to take this day of thanks to thank all of my friends who have been there for me and whom I will always be there for in return. You guys rock the hardest.
KELLY - I know why you had to go, I know you needed to be somewhere where you could get back on your feet, my brain all of this, and yet my heart just can't accept it. Since you moved, I feel like someone has torn off my right arm. Promise me that if this school isn't a good fit you'll come back home. Promise me that if living with your parents makes you want to go all Menendez brothers you'll come back home. In fact, just promise me you'll come back home, because I miss you so much it hurts.
GINA - Thank you for always being the voice of reason and the mature adult who has probably kept Kelly and me out of the Big House when our shenanigans escalated. I am in constant awe of your ability to seamlessly balance work, marriage, and your beautiful baby boy. I am in even GREATER awe that someone as classy as you would want to hang out with a dipshit like me; but I'm glad you do.
CURTIS - I don't even know where to begin. You are, beyond all doubt, the best friend I have ever had. You're that 3:00am friend. You know, the one I can call at some ungodly hour and I know you'll be there for me. Partly because you're an amazing human being and partly because you're as big an insomniac as I so I know you'll be awake anyway. I love you more than you will ever know.
JENNA - How have we not known each other forever, because, seriously? You are the one who shows up with cookies after a shitty breakup, the one who taught my short people inappropriate hand gestures, and the only person I know who could convince me to scale a wall and jump off of a building.*
*Yeah, that happened.
You are magical, my friend.
JOHI - God bless the interwebs for bringing you into my life and God bless you for being so wicked rad that I will never let you leave. I can't think of anyone I would rather tour Chicago and buy shoes with. You are every bit as beautiful on the inside as the out with just the proper dash of asshole to make you fabulous. xoxo
KANSAS KELLY - My twin. My fellow autism momma. And the woman with as majestic an ex-husband as mine. We've been through some shit, mah deah. But somehow it's easier to get through when I know I have someone like you holding hands through it all. Take care of you.
DYLAN - Although things didn't work out with us, I will be eternally grateful to you for restoring my faith in true love. I am so glad to still have you as a friend; you are a good man. But you're still a lousy cook, Dude. I'm just sayin'. . .
BEX - Screw customs, screw immigration, we WILL find a way to get you to the States. And when we do, Johi and I will take you wildstriding to Taco Bell where we will dine like kings. Huzzah!
KEVIN & EMILY - You two give me hope and rekindle my belief in the fairy tale ending. I love you both with all my heart but seriously! Enough with the snake pics on Facebook or at least warn a bitch first! One day I will make it to your Shire and mingle with you and the rest of the hobbits.
BRANDON - My buddy, my headache, my science project. We have the weirdest friendship on record but somehow it seems to work for us. I'll always have your back, Kid. And yes, I will continue to "Mom the shit out of you" for the rest of your life so suck it up, Buttercup.
JAKE - I would still adore you even if you didn't hook a bitch up with free concert tickets on the regular. Your blend of down-home country boy and anal-retentive control freak is like a one-man show of "The Odd Couple" and I love every minute of it.
ABBY - So, you have issues. Don't we all. What I love the most about you is that you own your shit and aren't afraid to call other people out on theirs. You abilities as a writer are only surpassed by your ability to give hope and clarity and kindness to others. You are a blessing.
BISH - Whether we were spitting mashed potatoes at each other at formal sorority dinners or skipping class to drink shitty champagne at University Park, I have always known you were a kindred spirit. Even though months can go by without seeing or speaking to you, when I see you again it's like no time has passed. That is the sign of a true soulmate.
MISTY - I still consider you my friend. We each had hurt feelings, all of which were valid, but I'm over it and hope you are too. I miss you.
If I've left anyone off I am truly sorry but it's a little hard for me to think right now when I'm crying like a little bitch. Yeah. . .you broke me. Looking at every name on this list makes me feel so happy and yet so vulnerable. I have given a piece of my heart to all of you, and with that comes the risk that it will be crushed. I don't trust easily, but I trust all of you. Thank you for honoring that trust. Thank you for trusting me with your hearts in return. Thank you for the gift of your friendship. Thank you for being you.